$50.

When I was in Niagara Falls (NF) last weekend, I parked my car on a street I’d parked on a thousand times in my life. NF locals don’t drive their cars into the waterfall’s state park. Albany runs the show there, and they charge a parking fee. Residents who want to jog, walk their dogs, or hang out anyplace close to the waterfall park outside Albany’s oversight, on the street. That’s what I did – because that’s what we were taught by our parents, going back to when they pushed us around the Falls in our strollers.

The state park was set up to preserve the beauty of the Falls. So, there aren’t restaurants, shops, or places to grab a coffee. Bryant Park in NYC has a café, chess boards, and open grass where people toss frisbees, sunbathe, or picnic. The area around the Falls isn’t like that – it’s just people in motion, phones in hand, recording, FaceTiming, broadcasting. If you live there, you’re not paying a fee to walk along a river that happens to be in your neighborhood.

Bryant Park, Manhattan

The parking ticket I got came as a surprise. The starting fee is $50. But if it isn’t paid within 14 days, it jumps straight to $200. The penalties for not paying the $200 must be ugly – maybe you can’t register your car, renew your license, or worse, they issue a warrant. Minimum wage in New York State is $15 an hour; after taxes, let’s call it $11. In NF, there’s more minimum wage action than real salary opportunities. That means some people have to work five extra hours just to pay the piper for a parking ticket. Miss the deadline, and it’s half a week’s pay.  I’ve heard of people having to sell their cars to pay their fines.

A handheld machine printed the ticket, so the city has every detail and will know exactly who to chase if the money doesn’t flow. But I can’t pay the fine online. The city only takes checks. No Venmo, no credit card. City leaders don’t want anyone to see how much comes in – or where it goes.

For the people who set this up, $50 is nothing. And if they were to get a ticket, there’s no world in which they’d have to pay it.

Membership has its privileges.

The gauge is on. Everyone, everywhere, is getting squeezed.

As Published in Dallas Morning News

I once worked at a private school where one of my tasks was issuing parking permits to students. They weren’t cheap. There were more spaces than cars, but we still charged the fee. Parents paid it – on top of tuition, books, activities, and uniforms. The money collected had no real purpose. Families paid it…because they could. I was 26. The Niagara Falls in me couldn’t understand. Why are we charging them for this, I asked. The headmaster’s answer: “Because we can.”

It’s a give less, take more world. And it isn’t just your money. The bosses want your time. Their kids and families come first. Yours? Not their problem. Social media and the press want your eyes. They’ll make things up just to keep your attention…because ad revenue depends on it. And when we’re all on solar energy, there’ll be a tax on the sun. I assure you.

Fictionally, if someone had approached me on that same street, on the same day on which I got my parking ticket, and asked for a $50 donation to help a Niagara Falls family rebuild their boarded-up home, I’d have given it gladly.

People want to give. But…they DO NOT want to be taken from.

That’s why, two weeks ago, I decided to bring a new life into mine and my son’s home. His name is Louie. He’s a Boston Terrier – barely the size of my hand right now – just two weeks old. In September, I’ll drive hours and hours to pick him up. Until then, I’ll get videos from the breeder of this little black-and-white heartbeat that will soon be ours.

Bringing a pet into your home is a deliberate act of giving. You give your time. Your attention. Your patience, money, and space. In return, they give you something no government fee or corporate policy can take – connection. They meet you at the door. They curl up beside you. They trust you completely.

The world is relentless in how it chips away at us – bills, rules, politics, noise. But giving – the real giving – is the connective tissue that keeps the spirit intact. It’s what undoes the damage. It’s what reminds us we still get to choose where our $50 goes – into the dark hole of a parking ticket, or toward something that fills our home with love and makes our hearts lighter.

If the pedigree is solid and he makes it through training, Louie will be a certified comfort companion. I want him to sit with kids who need a friend, bring a moment of joy to an elderly person in a nursing home, curl up beside someone in a hospital bed, and make them forget, even for a few minutes, their distress and their pain. Maybe, in his small way, he’ll be giving back to people like the ones I grew up with in Niagara Falls – the ones who deserve more kindness than they get.

Meet Louie!

My middle finger to a world that insists on taking is my giving more…giving better. Louie will be part of that. My son will see it, learn from it, and carry it forward. Together, maybe we can tip the balance back toward kindness.

With or without my fifty bucks.